Thursday, 15 September 2011

Tears for Fears

"They" ( "they" being the invisible experts that i often refer to when i am not sure of the source of my fact/statistic) say that we are born with just 2 natural fears, a fear of loud noises and the fear of falling, all other fears are learnt as we grow up. I recently read about a study which proves parents are the cause of their children's fears, that fears are passed down through our behaviour, which technically means my daughter will inherit my long list of irrational fears including the dark, spiders, flies, clowns, kitten heels and my own shadow, to name but a few, along with her dads fear of all things gory, he cant bear watching operations on television that feature incisions of any description (i on the other hand relish watching things like embarrassing illnesses, the lumpier and bumpier and more painful looking the patients complaint the better for me) the problem i have is i don't want her to be a scaredy cat like me, i wish i could manage my fears better so they wouldn't be so glaringly obvious to her, i have already had to deal with attempting to waft a wasp away from her while being terrified myself (its not just the fear of being stung, i don't like they have fur and i could possibly swallow them, irrational? i know) The theory of "hereditary" fears must entirely dependant on the individual as i don't recall my own parents ever being frightened of the things i run away from, in fact my mum used to calmly remove spiders from my room, encourage wasps out of the windows and even walk into dark rooms at night without putting the light on...ooooh the thought of such madness makes me shudder!

Luckily one of the only things i am not frightened of is needles (don't get me wrong if i was being chased by somebody wielding a dirty needle i wouldn't be cool, calm and collected, but as a rule getting a needle doesn't bother me) so when it came to Tilly getting her 12 week immunisations i wasn't scared, just upset that she had to go through the discomfort, i was cuddling her throughout, she must have been wondering why i sat back and let the mean lady push the sharp object in her thigh!

I have decided to make a conscious effort to become less fearful to ensure my little one never has to witness me being a wuss, first up i will brush my teeth in the dark...baby steps to a new me.

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